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Sunday, September 6, 2015

SANTA'S URBAN SURVIVAL GUIDE


“SANTA’S URBAN SURVIVAL GUIDE” by William Milne


Screenshot fromSANTA'S URBAN SURVIVAL GUIDE 2014-05-17 17:54:38


        Yes, this is one of my books at amazon.com. It is not for the faint of heart.  It‘s packed with extreme humour from an ex-attorney who has also been in jail. Every disturbing scene is based or real violent reality or drug-induced madness and toxic psychosis, events that have really happened. Only the names have been changed and/or omitted. It’s not to everyone’s taste, but it is to my taste.
        I have always had a sadistic sense of humour and being cast naked into solitary confinement for ninety days didn't help.   Being fed at groin level by a big-hipped woman guard in a tight grey flannel skirt , what does it do? It can make you fall in love!
        But it also takes an already twisted sense of humour and twists in more. Ferments it real good – so much so that after a while you don’t care if you speak the bizarre truth - however socially unacceptable the truth may be.
         The first scene describes how to survive an attack by a 260 pound expert in the martial arts, who for years now has been lifting weights at night on major hits of speed. Lifting all night long. How to escape this monster when he’s on a near-fatal dose of PCP (Angel Dust) which really intensifies the situation, if you happen to run into him at midnight in what to you is a public park, but to him the park is a much darker reality…He's in Rome 2,000 years ago, and you're not.
        Yes, how to survive this and how to survive that – arrest while you’re hallucinating – what not sign when you wake up restrained in a forensic clinic – how to pay your criminal lawyer when you’re out of money, and what to pay him with!
        How to survive a demented fiend who is pretending to be your dentist. How to build a BONG as big as a Volkswagen. How to pretend you’re drunk in the bullpen, when really you’re extremely happy and HIGH on a massive hit of DMT or LSD 25.
         And much much more written by an author who can only laugh this way because he has formerly been in many untenable and dark places, which he is surprised he survived.
        Right now “SANTA'S URBAN SURVIVAL GUIDE” is available at amazon.com,  author William Milne, as an e-book for $2.99.
        You can also get the very same book under the title, ‘A COMIC’S APPROACH TO HALLUCINATIONS AND TOXIC PSYCHOSIS”  by Walker  Ballantine for the soon to be new price of $10.00.
        This just one of my books at amazon.com. There are two others which I’ll write about another time.
         Enjoy the book.  (You can read the first chapter without paying a cent!) And see if you like it… 
         There is much more material to come under other titles. Only I know exactly how much.

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